As the Debbie Downer (wamp waaaah) to Shannza's Positive Paula, I present to you a compelling video analysis of the current economic crisis that will no doubt encourage you to heed the advice below, while simultaneously asking yourself: What (the hell) would Suze Orman do (now)?
As if watching the History Channel's Last Days on Earth (I highly recommend it) wasn't enough to make me want to carry around a lethal dose of sleeping pills "just in case", today I watched this 30-minute, fairly comprehensive (though at times incomprehensible), clip from I.O.U.S.A.
Holy mother, we are screwed.
Though I've never been one for "economics," "balanced budgets," or "math in general," I took quite a bit away from this video, the least of which was solace.
Here's what I learned:
1) Mom was right. I should have been and should be "saving". Fair enough. But when US Weekly calls, she calls, and she's worth every penny. What if there's a nuclear attack tomorrow. Gone will be the fund for that "rainy day", so at least I will die in relative peace knowing how Jennifer Aniston "does it"...
2) Maybe that pack of peanut M&Ms wasn't worth the "free" credit card (college freshmen take note). Apparently there is no such thing as "free" anything. (Dammit!) (Tear.)
3) Maybe "mercantilism" isn't such a dirty word after all.
4) Fear "China".
5) "Treasury secretaries" drive sick cars. I recommend getting yourself one in these dire times. (A treasury secretary, that is. Show of hands: Who thinks Paulson's a hottie?! I knew it. Ditto that.)
Anyway, educate yourself.
Here's to Lifetime movies, and caviar dreams.
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